Saturday, October 16, 2004

Well, this has certainly been the week from Hell!

Last Sunday was my mother's 75th birthday. She's not doing well at all. She can barely sit up anymore and is alert opnly infrequently. In the last 10 years, she has had a sextuple cardiac bypass, an arterial graft to repair an aortal aneurysm, and 3 strokes that we know of. There may have some other minor ones that we just didn't notice. She now has the limited use of one arm. She's no longer eating solid food. She is functionally blind and partially deaf. This is what diabetes does to you. This is me in 30 years. I only hope that the first heart attack or stroke kills me immediately, so I don't have to just hang on like this. It's a nightmare for her and a nightmare for us.

Then things got worse.

Sunday night, my mother-in-law died. She was 88 and had Alzheimer's Disease. I don't know of anything worse than that. We have watched her die a small piece at a time for almost 20 years. For the last 5 years or so, she has been completely irrational and delusional. She didn't know anybody and was completely uncooperative. Alzheimer's is a total horror for all concerned. Please make a donation to the Alzheimer's Association when you can.

It's a relief that she's finally at rest, but it's still hard on her children. I learned a lot about how different people react to death and grief, and the insanity that often follows. It has not been fun.

That was all bad enough, but it still wasn't over.

We had Beebie's funeral on Wednesday, after the requisite pushing and shoving and name-calling, etc., among her children. Just before we left for the funeral home, we got word that my wife's Aunt Mary, Beebie's brother's wife, had had a massive stroke and was not expected to live. She died later that day.

I feel like I have undergone the bastinado, body and soul.

Hoping for better days ahead.


At 11:25 AM, Blogger Joel said...

"Pity not the dead, for they feel pain no more, but feel for the living they have left behind."

My condolences to this difficult time for you and your family.


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