Monday, August 08, 2005

What She Said

Mir, at Woulda Coulda Shoulda, has a great post about what she calls "Ghost Days". I know exactly what she means.

That's the kinda of day I'm having today. I'm completely disconnected from the world, like I'm watching a movie. It's not a very exciting one, I'm afraid. My life is definitely not in the action/adventure genre. There's a psychological term for this, I know, but I can't think of what it is, and I really just don't care right now. :-b

I hate depression. I hate being so out of control. It's also a major pain in the ass to lose days out of my life being so damn worthless. Days like this, it's all I can do just to go through the motions. I'll be glad when I get back on the upswing again. Hope it's soon.

An unexpected side effect fo all this internal strife is that I got some good progress on a short story named "Sea Change" that I started a couple of years ago and never quite figured out where it was going. Bad news is that I ripped out about 2/3 of what I had. Good news is that I got all that back and more. I now can see a couple ways to get to the end, and one of them looks really promising. That helps. Being on the verge of tears all the time helps me cut loose and just let the shit flow out. It usually winds up being some pretty decent writing.

Now I just have to live through 4 more hours of work, then try to get to the gym and sit on the bike for a half an hour. No way I'm going to be able to do the weights tonight. I already wasted 2 hours messing around with HaloScan so I can do Trackbacks. Hope that works. This is the first post I've tried with that, so we'll see. If Mir's site crashes, it's probably my fault. Hell, the way things are going right now, I'll probably crash Blogger and HaloScan, too. Fuck it, we'll pick up the pieces tomorrow.


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